A while back I wrote a post titled “You might be a crunchy mama if…“. In the past few weeks, I’ve been living some really great material for a new list. As the parent of a newborn and an 18 month old, I’m ALWAYS exhausted. I am trying hard to keep myself fueled with caffeine and keep myself going, but alas – it doesn’t always work. So, if you have experienced any of the things on the list below, you might just have a newborn in the house. Worry not, they do grow up! And with time, and coffee, you will start feeling human again (eventually).
You might be an overtired parent of a newborn if:
1) Your baby has a pediatrician’s appointment in the morning so you decide to set an alarm so that you don’t oversleep. You wake up in the morning 20 minutes after it was supposed to go off. You check your phone and realized you set the alarm for 7pm instead of 7 am. Good thing the baby woke you up.
2) You go to make your tired self a cup of coffee, and decide to put the Keurig to use. You start the machine and leave for a second and return to find your countertop covered in coffee because you forgot to put a cup under the drip.
3) You fill out the paperwork at the pediatrician’s office with all of your oldest child’s information.
4) You can’t remember if you sent a birth announcement or thank you card to a relative, so you send them another.
5) You wash all of your clothes that have been spit up on and put them in the dryer, only to forget to turn it on. 🙁
6) You prepare a wonderful meal in the crockpot so it will be ready when your spouse comes home, and turn it on. When they get home you realize that you forgot one important thing- plugging the darn thing in.
7) You decide to go out into the real world and you actually get a chance to pull your look together: you brush your teeth, wash your face, and put your contacts in. When you get into the car you put your glasses on to drive, and by the time you get to your destination you have a RAGING headache. It takes you a while to realize why.
8) You sign a check with your maiden name.
9) You make yourself a bowl of cereal, and put the milk back in the pantry instead of the fridge.
All of the above have happened to me after the birth of one of my daughters. This last story though, the one that tops it all, comes to you from one of my favorite college professors.
10) You are starting back at work, and your supportive hubby knows you need to be well rested. So when the baby wakes up in the middle of the night, he volunteers to change the diaper after you do the feeding. You wake up in the morning to find the baby and the bassinet both covered in poop. And no diaper to be seen.